Letters to the Editor

Dear OFOQ EIC,

Happy New Year! As a third-generation Orator consumer, I’m excited about the possibilities and potential the new partnership offers for the paper and the entire Orange Forest metro area. Best of luck, and can’t wait to see what the future holds!

Sincerely,

Number One Orator Consumer

Editor’s Response

Dear Number One Orator Consumer,

We here at the Orator greatly appreciate the kind sentiment and the unwavering support from the Number One Orator Consumer family. We expect from all of our dear readers, news consumers, and avid fans the same level of inexorable loyalty, no matter the circumstance, situation, or allegations.

I’m reminded of a trinket that I happened upon here in the Orator’s office as I immersed myself in my new surroundings. It was a small wooden wall plaque with brass letters that was buried in a drawer at an unused desk. Although I immediately placed it in the circular filing cabinet, I do recall that the brass letters read: “If it ain’t the Orator, it’s just a truth traitor.”

We here at the Orator still stand by that Truth. So do please remember that if you do not read it in the Orator, please discount it and dispose of it as treacherous rubbish.

Dear OFO,

I’m not suggesting anyone do this, but those Flaggists lounging around on Quincy Forbin Boulevard need a good noggin bootin’. You know what I mean? Again, I’m not advocating for violence. But seriously, I wish someone would give those Flaggists some real solid steel-toe skull blows. Please don’t get me wrong, I’m an extremely peaceful person, and I love everybody. I avoid the BizStrict because of the growing Zemblan crime, but I see on the news all the time how those Flaggists are causing too much trouble. And if we can’t kick ‘em out, let’s just kick ‘em.

Signed,

Belligerently Peaceful

Editor’s Response

Dear Belligerently Peaceful,

We understand your concern, and while we here at the Orator also in no way condone or encourage violence, we do share your sentiments most deeply.

We also understand your hesitance to venture into the Business District, but we do encourage you to patronize the wonderful establishments and their affordable consumer offerings.

Also, please remember we’re no longer simply the Orange Forest Orator. We’re now the Orange Forest Orator Quarterly.

Got something on your mind? Submit your Letter to the Editor here: notablog@orangeforestonline.com